Bollywood's Thumb Rules

• A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beatings but will wince when a woman tries to cleanse his wounds.
• If a large pane of glass is visible, one of the villains will be thrown through it before long.
• Nothing is too tight for Madhuri.
• The hero cannot fall in love with the heroine (vice versa) unless they first perform a dance number in the rain.
• Once applied, make-up is permanent, while waking up from sleep or in rain or in any other situation.
• A large group of goondas can be shooting at the hero, but he will never be hit, unless of course he is attempting to save the chick. (The bullet wound would tendered by the heroine by a piece of cloth torn from her own chunari or pallu!)
• A large group of goondas can be shooting at the hero with machine guns, yet they will always miss. Every shot the hero takes from his small revolver will knock down at least ten opponents in a line.
• If you decide to start dancing in a field, everyone you bump into will know all the steps, and will be wearing coordinated outfits.
• It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
• A heroine will have time to change outfits several times in one song, however short.
• When its time to shoot the villian, the Hero will take the opportunity to render a lengthy dialogue.
• The Hero would beat up the villain without killing him....The Hero reunites with the kidnapped Heroine, long lost mother, long lost kumbh ka mela brother followed by some emotional hugs and dialogues.... The villain, unable to take the defeat, would make a final attempt to kill the Hero which leaves the Hero no option but to kill the villain. (Basically legitimizing a murder)
• My Favourite: Police comes in the end of any and every movie